Hey Tony! First of all - I want to let you know that I understand your frustration. Really. Trust me I do.
However - let me tell you that expectations are EVERYTHING, not just in AM but also true for everything else in life.
On every affiliate network there are nicer and more helpful AMs - and then there are ones that are less friendly to newbies. Your expectations will directly determine which kind of AM you'll get. This may sound weird to you, and most people may think it's pure luck (of lack thereof), but as someone who is sensitive to energy and understands how it works, I can tell you without any doubt that this is true.
Also, sometimes it's not that you're being ignored - for example that aff network you said you never heard from: When I contacted them they said you had applied a mere 4 days before, and 3 of those were the weekend + holiday in Canada. However, your belief that they were ignoring you would cause other networks/AMs to actually ignore you! How screwed up is that? You don't need to let that happen!
So - you need to somehow shift your belief about AMs and networks etc. There are lots of nice and helpful people around so just keep reminding yourself of that fact and you'll meet more of them! I'll PM you some contacts I have at a few aff networks - they're all newbie-friendly AMs that will take great care of you. 
Regarding your questions on conversion testing and "participation required": I'm not familiar with conversion testing at all. I know I should verify each offer I promote but the truth is I test so many offers that I very rarely try to trigger a conversion to make sure it's actually working.
So hopefully someone else will come along and answer that question. As for "participation required" - that's a question only your AM can answer, but my guess is that if you put it in small font at the bottom of your banner, it should satisfy that requirement.
Check your PM. 
Amy
Amy,
I've read your post and it was very motivational for me, You are the first one I met here and you are the only one whenever I have problem I send you message and you reply it and help, Don't know how can I say thanks for your reply and PM I really don't find any words to say that.
When I read your post I remember john lennon's song and I am going to send it to you as gift.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVg2EJvvlF8
